One last piece before the clock strikes 12

Just as midnight arrives, everyone in the club started hugging and wishing each other Happy New Year 2008! Now I’m here completing one last blog entry for the year 2008. Sitting here while most people are out having a blast to usher in the New Year, I am here reminiscing about all that had taken place in 2008 itself. It is a year which sees me moving forward and further from my safe circle. It was also a fun year for me.

Life started with me struggling to fight the fact that ‘he’ belongs to someone else now. I’ve gone through times where thoughts of us together linger across my mind. It just left a bad feeling there and then. Eventually I got over that feeling and opened myself up to the world outside.

Having found new friends and colleagues, lifestyle changes. Being a passive person I had gotten myself involved in some outdoor activities which lead to me participating in an adventure race. That experience was priceless. I had managed to fulfill my hidden dream of being involved in such activity. The race had also helped me work on my fear of heights.

Everything in life seems to happen continuously bringing one experience to another. The past year had seen me standing firm on my decision for the longest time. Playing the role of putting down someone else’s hope was not nice at all. But having no choice, a stern stand had to be made clear for it had put me in a dilemma which I never imagined would befall upon me. Alas I’ve made the right decision. This experience not only made me stronger, it also opened my eyes to discovering what I want in life.

I’ve had a wonderful birthday this year which I organized myself. Of course venue was at daddy’s restaurant at Sungai Ara. After that it was all work with income tax submission datelines. There had been many surprises this year with a last minute holiday trip back to the land of my origins. Not to forget the wonderful Asian ECK Youth Retreat at El Sanctuary, Malacca.

All these great happenings had been wonderful and made my life more beautiful. Being presented the abundance of having great friends and meeting amazing people, life has been an interesting journey. I have opened my heart up to accept whatever that is being laid upon me and I love it.

To Janice & Karen, thanks for standing by for me all these while. Our beach escapades, crazy food frenzy and movie weekends had been so much fun because of your presence. Of course 2009 may see more crazy small gatherings and we could have AL and the ever so entertaining ‘cuntilicious Ced’ with us, making us laugh till we tear. Oh not to forget covering our faces with Menus and praying hard that the restaurant proprietor don’t chase us out because our ‘ga-ga-ness’ made other restaurant patrons think we are crazy.

To the others who’d made an appearance in my life, the time which we’d spent together has made my life amazing and I’m grateful that we all crossed path.

Have A Wonderful New Year!!!

Maids who irritate me...

Indonesian maids. I have been having the luxury of having an Indonesian maid since primary school. All these while I have the perception that they are here to work and to earn an income for their poor family back in their homeland. My perception has been so until recently. Of course I am not talking about my own maid but I’m talking about those maids that had been hired by one of the stall operators at my dad’s coffee shop.

A few months back there is this one maid, let’s call her S. She was hired to work for D. I don’t usually care about them because I just couldn’t be bothered. However, my mum is at the shop everyday so she knows what is going on and during weekends I would just sit by her side in the counter and we’d talk. So she told me about S. She has a string of boyfriends here. In my humble opinion, she is not hot at all. First glance I think you would have ran away even if you are a lady looking at her. What more a man. And how did she manage to get a line of men under her arms? Well for her it’s easy. Formula is just spread your legs wide open and there you have all the men you want. *sick* Frankly, by the look of her face, and if I were a man, I really tak lalu la… I don’t know how these men are able to go for her.

Anyway, one Sunday as I was helping my mum in the shop, there was a commotion suddenly. I went to see what was going on and to my surprise S was going through some kind of fit and she was crying. Then I heard her lady boss M said “ketagih nafsu”. S went into a fit because she could not control her so called ‘sexual desire’. The cause of the fit is because she saw 2 of her boyfriends at the shop. If I’m not mistaken one is a Mat Indon and another is Pak Bangla. She is so so international. Since that incident she stopped working with D.

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The next story is about another maid who also works for D. I’ll call her L. She is still under his employment of D but she seems to irritate my by the days. It all started one evening when my family and I were having our dinner at the dining table in the shop. L came in to clear the plates when the customers had left. She was not wearing any shoes. Being the shop owner, my dad told her to wear shoes. She looked up to my dad and said “ Saya orang miskin jadi tak pakai kasut.” Bloody kurang ajar. I was going to stand up and slap her that instance. But since she did not offend me I just let her be. Here people are being nice and caring enough to advise her that she wear shoes and she had to retaliate back with such remarks. Thus, from that day onwards the look of her face also irritates me.

Every morning the maids who work for D would come in very early in the morning to prepare the dishes for his Nasi Melayu stall. They would come and then use our toilet to change before starting their work. During weekdays, I would have to use the toilet in the morning. One morning I find the toilet being used. Fine. So I went upstairs and get some stuff done before I go down again. Just as I reached the end of the stairs, L walked in and wanted to go to the toilet. Being cranky in the morning, I shouted at her asking her to use the other toilet. I may sound selfish but that is my house and what more I need to use the toilet. Furthermore, it was L who walked in. So that was her lucky day.

From then on, I told my maid not to let the Indonesian workers come in to change until I get wake up. But the problem doesn’t stop there. I really do not know what is inside their head. Obviously when you see that a toilet door is close then the toilet is occupied. Kanasai (bear with me, please) don’t know which Indon maid come and pull at the door when I was inside the toilet. No, the door did not open but won’t you feel irritated? So I yelled at that person outside, “Woi you bodoh ka?!! Tak nampak pintu sudah tutup?!!” My mum heard me and she continued to scold that Indon worker, “Apala you, sudah nampak pintu tutup lagi tarik-tarik buat apa?! You orang punya rumah tak ada tandas ka?!!” That was it from that day onwards, I purposely wake up late so that they don’t get to come in to change. And if I know they are outside the toilet waiting I would wait till they go cannot tahan and had to go out to work before I get out of there. They even got scolded by my maid for their stupidity. See even my maid is not on their side. They are just plain se-too-pit!!

Last weekend I got my chance to get back at L. She was asked to collect money from customers. So, she went around collecting payments from the customers who ordered nasi. As usual there would be the need to for lose change. During weekends, I would be the one sitting at the counter. That Saturday, L came up to the counter and asked if I can change two RM5 notes for her. I was rather reluctant but change for her anyway. Sunday came and L was on duty to make sure that the customers paid for their meals. Again L came up to the counter asking if I could provide her loose change for RM10. I was really really reluctant this time as I notice she is just lazy to walk back to the stall to get the change. So I changed for her two RM5 notes. Then she looked at me and asked if she can have five (5) RM1 notes. That was it la…. I kasi her nicely there and then. I snapped “Sudah tak ada tukarla.. You punya taukeh tak ada duit kecil ka? Buat apa perniagaan tak ada duit kecik? Tak ada, tak ada saya tak mahu tukar bagi you. You sendiri pi cari you punya taukeh tukar.” She gave me the pissed look and had to walk back to her stall and get the loose change. Hmph… Nak main dengan aku… Bukan begitu senang le cik adik Indon.

All these events had changed my perception on these people except for my maid as she somehow shares the same thought as us. She is not easily influenced by all the other maids even if she does mingle around with them. As for the others, the moment they step foot on our land, they tend to have forgotten where they came from. They take things for granted and do whatever they like. Forgetting about the hardship in their homeland, they misuse their permits and break laws. And they are one dirty bunch of people who sleeps around with anyone and everyone as long as they are provide with money, jewelleries and cell phones? Oh not to forget, as long as there are men who are interested in them they can just forget about the world. They would boast about this man and that man to their comrades which makes them sounds so cheap. DUH!! Worst is when the man comes and find them, there would be dramas to see which would make all those Bollywood actors and actresses cover their faces in shame.

The Christmas Wish Tree

MY CHRISTMAS WISHLIST

1) Jimmy Choo Saba Bag

2) Japanese Momiji Doll by the name of Rainbow (wheee!!)

3) The BodyShop Winter Trend 2009 Eye Palette (*blink blink*)

4) Buffalo 320G External Harddisk

5) Naughty Monkey Red Strappy Heels (HOT & SEXAY!!!)

6) Red hot round toed pumps ( SMOKING HOT)

7) The BodyShop Sparkle Lip Gloss

8) Audrey Hepburn 1000 pieces jigsaw puzzle ( Just love jigsaw puzzles)

9) Sexy Rock Chic hairstyle for the NEW YEAR!!!

10) New glasses (Dah nak buta dah)

11) SUNSHINE SURPRISE !!

12) MORE SURPRISES!!!

Please note that the items above are in random order as there is no preference of what is more important because all of them are of EQUAL importance.

8 days till Christmas.....

Christmas is just around the corner and the mood is already revolving around everyone. Shopping malls, shops, offices and radio stations are already getting everyone into the festive mood. The nicely adorned Christmas trees and colourful Christmas cards make this holiday season a colourful one. Not to forget the parties and makan sessions that are going to take place…. Roast turkey, Christmas puddings, cookies…ahh those are the blissful moments of Christmas.

Of course Christmas would not be complete without presents especially for the little ones…but me being a ‘grown-up’ kid, I just can’t help myself but to have my own Christmas Wish Tree…

There you have it....my Christmas Tree.... with that I'd like to wish everyone

MERRY CHRISTMAS

MAY YOUR CHRISTMAS BE FILLED WITH LOVE AND GOOD CHEER!!

R.E.S.P.E.C.T please

Frustrated. That’s the first word I can think of right now. I’ve never met a person so self-centred in this lifetime. I wonder what I’d owe him in my past life that he had to come and make my life so miserable.

He is a person who is made of profanities. Every sentence which comes out from him would never be spared from profanity. Be it in English, Hokkien, Cantonese, Malay or even Tamil… he’s got ‘em all in his vocabulary. It is not like I have never used them but he has gone way too far. I seriously think that he should start to learn to cut down on all the ‘flowery’ vocabulary he had been using all these years. Besides, he’s not 15 anymore. He’s already 20 years of age yet he still hasn’t learned what can and cannot be said.

Profanity is not the only issue that I have against him. Having to live with him for almost 20 years I have tried my very best to be the best I could be to him. We were never really close during our younger days yet as we grew I’d tried to make things better but to no avail. Frankly, I was very happy and excited when he come up to me and talks about things that are going on in his life now after so long but there are so many things that are missing.

When he is in need of favours, he’ll have the nicest talk. But he tends to want things his ways. I accept that it is his character but being a six footer, with good looks and well build, I think he needs to learn what the word RESPECT means.

The reason I said he needed to learn to respect is because he really doesn’t respects anyone. Maybe in front of his elders he is but not with me. And when the elders are not around he can curse and swear at them saying that whatever their ideas or thoughts are well rubbish and his is right. I’ve heard him say it all, but I had to bottle everything up and keep mum as I don’t want to hurt both my parents. And I feel the pain of him being so disrespectful. Recently, he’d made a public remark about me. I was furious as he’d never made such remarks. Well at least not in public. I told him off and eventually forgave him before he had apologized. Oh boy I was so wrong. He did it again. Today.

He was making so much noise in the house about his Porche cap. Demanding his 2 younger brothers to look for him he kept throwing profanities at them while making sure that they find his cap. Of course those 2 younger wants would throw back profanities at him but it seems like it’s their common way of communication. I was pissed off with all the noise he was making and suggested since his cap could not be found then forget it. He gave me a reason that his hair does not look good. I told him to get a hair cut and he replied by saying that there is no one to drive him to the hairstylist shop. I was already burning up and told him to take a bus. He walked out of the room and shout ‘tiu you la’ ( which means f**k you in Cantonese) .

That was it. I really cannot take it anymore. As long as he has no respect for me or anyone for that matter I’ll have to go against his requests. I may have to go against my own parents if I have no choice. And I strongly think the saying ‘blood is thicker than water’ should be replaced with ‘blood is thicker than water but THERE IS ALWAYS A LIMIT’. Despite the fact that I had forgive and forget everything that he’d done, this time I do not think I’m in a forgiving mood. I have had enough…. Instead of having a war of words with him I rather stay silent and go on with my own life...Yet, I foresee that I will go crazy soon as my pressure cooker is already up to it's limit...... Haihzz.....

Like only a woman can

Just love this song by ex-Westlife member, Brian McFadden.




Like Only a Woman Can

I wasn't perfect
I've done a lot of stupid things
I'm still no angel
I wasn't looking for forgiveness
Wasn't laid out by my pride
Shocked by her attention

And someone signed me up for love
I didn't want it
And now I can't live without it
She changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up
When she knows I'm sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can


She's kind of perfect
She's kind of everything I'm not
Yeah, she's an angel
And it's amazing how she's patient
Even more at times I'm not
She's my conscience

And who decided I'd be hers
I wanna hate them
Cos now I can't live without her

She changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up
When she knows I'm sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can


Like only a woman can
And who decided I'd be hers
I wanna hate them
Cos now I can't live without her


Oh, and she changed my life
She cleaned me up
She found my heart
Like only a woman can
She pulls me up
When she knows I'm sad
She knows her man
Like only a woman can


Like only a woman can
Like only a woman can
Like only a woman can

Jacks, Kings, Aces and Jokers : What will the final card be?

She picked a card.

51 one cards left in the deck. The dealer distributes the cards. When the first card was opened it is Jack of Clubs. She took the card. Being a naïve and young, freshly out of high school she didn’t give much thought about anything else apart from what she wanted to experience. The Jack of Clubs was taking things pretty fast and she just couldn’t catch up. Then, she decided to drop that card after a couple of weeks. Jack of Clubs isn’t the jack of all trades. And so she moved on….

Then the dealer decides to give her three (3) cards. Jack of Spades, Jack of Hearts and Jack of Diamonds. Three cards at the same time. Life got interesting from there. However, knowing what the Jack of Spades is made of, she turns down the card. Jack Spades was torn. Not for long though. Then it was the Jack of Hearts. Being much much older than she was, he probably had much more experience when it comes to picking up girls. Yet, she had her own preferences. Jack Hearts was not the right card.

Jack of Diamonds makes his move next. With both studying in the same institution, they meet everyday. What more in the same class. And constant teasing of friends made Jack Diamonds wanted her more. She being easily influenced didn’t think much. Soon she was with Jack Diamonds. Never be fooled by the name. Jack Diamonds is not all sparkly and polished. The real Jack Diamonds soon revealed himself as she got to know him more. Day and night without fail, her phone would ring. Sometimes every hour. Initially it was okay. But as time passes by, she was feeling trapped. When she is not around to answer the phone, it’ll continue to ring starting with 1 missed call to 3. Eventually the numbers grow to 10 and 20 and 30.

Then the deciding factor came in. Her friends were talking about going to have some fun in the club. Jack Diamonds was there when the conversation took place. Right after everyone left, he started his ‘lecture’. Questioning if she really is joining her friends. She didn’t think it was wrong. That night Jack Diamonds gave made the longest telephone call. Not knowing what was coming she answered the call. There and then he started questioning again not leaving out his lecture as well. She was frustrated with Jack Diamonds. Putting the phone away from her ear once in a while so that her ears won’t burn. After about a couple of hours the lecture stops.

That night, she decided that it is enough. Took her a few weeks to gain the courage and to finally stand up and said ENOUGH. Two nights before, she couldn’t sleep. Then the day came. She’d been avoiding his calls for the whole day. Then finally she answered. He asked what happened. She said nothing but there’s something she wanted to tell him yet don’t know how. Jack Diamonds asked if she wanted to let go of the card she is holding now. She said yes. He was surprised. He asked what his mistake was. She said none. Then what made her changed her mind ? Being the IceQueen, she told him there wasn’t any feeling involved in this game. Her answers were as cold as ice. He asked for a second chance. But no was the answer. Once is enough. So she broke free from the cage. Shattering Diamonds into dust. He still haunts her with profanity but soon he left the island. He left with no respect from her. A man with an ego higher than Mt Everest is best left to be with himself.

With Jack Diamonds off the deck, she was free again. A few years passed by. Along came the King of Hearts. This time being more assured of what she want she took more than a year to hold on to that card. With the King of Hearts around, she’d managed to grow a lot. She walked out of her ‘safe’ circle. Doing things which she never had thought she’ll do and experiencing the best feelings in her life. Every good and bad memory with the King of Hearts was cherished and treasured for he was her strength, her guide and best companion. But eventually she had to let go of the King of Hearts as he asked for it. She knew she couldn’t hold on to that card so she let it go.

Within a couple of weeks, she was back to having the time of her life. A couple of years later the dealer then brings in another card. She knew that card is not for her. That card is the one which we usually pick out before a game. Yes, it is the Joker. From the beginning she already made up her mind that the Joker is not her cue. Despite the dealer left the card there for her, she never gave it a second glance. Why? It’s because the Joker is not her choice of card. To compare the Joker with the King of Hearts will be unfair. Yet having been with King of Hearts, now she knows what card she wants. To be realistic, she may not have the she wants but an Ace of Spades or Ace of Hearts would be better than the Joker.

She tried pushing the Joker back to the dealer but it tends to come back to her no matter what. First attempt bounced back. Second attempt came right back into her face. Running out of ideas she made the third and final attempt. The final attempt made the Joker saw that she will not pick up that card no matter what. She might have cause a cut on the Joker however he was not torn. But she’d made her it very clear that he is never going to be the King of Hearts. Neither will he be the Ace of Spades nor Ace of Hearts.

And now the dealer is fiddling with another card. Whether the card is an Ace of Spades or Ace of Hearts, only the dealer knows. For the time being she is holding on to her own card.

What do you think is the card that she is holding?